The other day I was asked, “What’s the point?” Their rather sarcastic question was in response to a suggested (SMALL) step towards a path leading to change. My rather sarcastic response was, “Good question; Now tell me the answer.

What’s the point? Ever ask yourself this question?Typically it is because you don’t see a point.  There is a point; there always is. Most of the time, if not all, the person asking is really saying: It’s useless, nothing will change. In my experience, the person saying this is looking at a elephant and has forgot how to eat an elephant.

This will come as no surprise: People come to see me AFTER the train crash. Allow me to repeat the obvious; it’s easier to CHANGE tracks before the train crash. The person I saw the other day had lost his wife and job; seven years ago. That seven years ago was the Time for change  ← (link to another good post). A big factor of change, one everybody under estimates,  is time.

Everyone, I think, knows they need to change. How do I know this? Because of one ABSOLUTE TRUTH: Humans seek pleasure and avoid pain (some seek pleasure in pain, I’m not touching that).  Soooo, it’s not a matter of change but a new normal. What I mean is if you do the same thing long enough that something becomes your new normal. Soooo, despite being un-happy with your current whatever, you have excepted it as the new normal. Soooo, what’s the point?

Here’s a fun FACT:

DO Nothing and NOTHING happens

Seven years ago my person loss a job due to a injury. They received the equivalent of five years salary from the insurance claim. If my person came to me I would have said, “You have five years to transition.” That never happen so the conversation never happen and nothing happened instead of transition. A transition is the start of a new beginning after and old beginning has ended. Think about that. How many major transition can you recall in your story?

The wife was along for the ride only, so when the train crashed and seeing no plan to transition, she hooked a ride on another train. →  Look out for train hoppers. ← Hint: They are often Zombies. ← Another great post by me 😳  

Life is a stage and we are merely actors

Some people are Pro-Actors, as in proactive, while others are Re-Actors. My person was a Re-actor. A re-actor waits for events to happen and then reacts. Unfortunately, re-actors tend to exhibit less action and more acceptance.  This brings us back to time. There is a time for action. The longer time passes without action, the less chance of action. Math nerds will recognize this as inverse proportional relationship, as one goes up the other goes down. On the playground we knew this. As two guys squared off; the longer they hurled insults the less likely we see action.

So, after seven years of inaction [two years after the money ran out] my person came to see me. Yea me! If people come looking for a Therapist, their in luck, I am a therapist. However, if they come looking for a wizard, their out of luck. I am a therapist. After nearly two decades of therapy, I can easily spot those looking for a wizard from those looking for a therapist.  However, I do have a magic pill for my wizard seekers but I don’t control it, they DO!

There is a joke about a guy who prays to hit the Lottery. Year after year he prays the same prayer. Finally God answers his prayer … Buy a ticket!

My person came to  me for the magic pill and I gave it to him but like most wizard seekers,  was not satisfied because the main ingredient is ACTION.

The house of my person was literally falling down. I said, “I can help, I have successfully helped many in your shoes but first I need something from you.” “What” he replied. “I need you to literly clean your house.” To which the reply I received was, “What’s the point?”

Funny you should ask  😆

 

Reluctant Therapist